Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Obonics

I've been busy with faculty in-service activities all day (and thus haven't been been able to write). I'm hoping to do a little power-blogging later, but thought I'd get something posted in the meantime -- you know it's hard out there for a neocon!

Anyway, I have no clue where she came from, but Miss Rondell, at left, commented at last night's Dishwalla entry, dissing the sounds and recommending some "Poi Dog Pondering"? Okay, fine. Not into that, frankly. But Rondell's "Obonics" did catch my attention. It's one thing to be cool and down with the brothers ... it's quite another to converse that way in written word, all the time.

I thought perhaps it was just at
the comment she left, but it's more actually. For example, "GoBahamaObama":
I believes that it be important to respect other peoples and they native lands. That's what black people like. On this cruise, we celebrate in ways that show our strong cultural heritage and we be spreain' the words of Gobama across these waters. Here go some pitchers from last night's Stars And Stripes Forever: Red, White, Blue, Black, and Everything in Between: Sponsored by the McDonald's McGriddle: I'm Lovin' It: Obama Celebration: Our Time Has Come For A Change: Soul Train and Buffet Party ...
And more, "Ain't Gonna Let No Man Get Me Down!!":
Here go a little re-cap for y'all:Sunday morning I woke up with a spring in my step and leaped outta bed and whipped up a big batch of chocolate chip waffles with a side of pork rinds (my favorite). I went straight to the J.C. Penney to pick up my special order of his/her monogrammed match towels and had them wrapped up all Valentime's like for Mr. C.

At 6pm Mr. C. picked me up for our Red Lobster Passion of the Sea Love Boat All You Can Eat feast. We had just started enjoying our cheesey biscuits when he started getting that Love Bug in he eye. I flirtashusly asked him what all the winks were about, thinking I'd prompt him to get that ring outta he pocket, but instead he just got out some eye drops and said his doctor messed up he contact prescription and he had an irritation in he eyes. I always think the cup half full so I was still certain that he was going to drop on that knee any minute.

Y'all, it wasn't until after dessert, he stepped our for a minute to go to the car and came back with a big gift-wrapped box. I was like DAMN that must be a big diamond cause that box huge for a ring. I tore into that like a cheetah on a water buffalo. You know what he got me! A Boost Mobile phone with a "Let's Get It On" ring tone and they cheapest plan! Y'all I could barely finish my fifth Bahama Breeze refill and Chocolate Volcano Cake but I did it. And when that last morsel went in my mouth, I brushed everything off that table with the swoop of my arm ending in a slap upside his head! Then I grabbed he car keys out of he coat pocket, stormed out that restaurant, and drove myself home. And yes, I parked he car right in front of that fire hydrant and it wasn't there this morning!

Hey Katrina, Mr. C. all yours now! Rondell don't want him no more. He gonna have to settle for a nappy ass woman who already littered a few pups of her own. Rondell's purity is too good for him! ...
Pardon my own slang here for a moment, but my daddy done tol' me dat Mr. Charley goin' t'own my po' llittle black ass if I didn' knows how be writin' in stan'rd English ... know what' I'm sayin'? And with a steady hand, mofo!. Miss Rondell's from Tupelo, Mississippi, but she might as well be from another world. And she don't seem so po' herself, considerin' all those ocean cruises she be talkin' 'bout. But I better be careful here, yo! Jes' be's messin' wit' dis heah stuff an' I be gettin' attacked as RAAACIST!! See, "Talking White: Yes We Can, Say Blacks."

8 comments:

Grizzly Mama said...

Is this for real???

Donald Douglas said...

Grizzly: Click the links to the lady's blog. Not only is this real, this is the face of black America today, said to say.

Cargosquid said...

If I had seen that without the rest of the article, I would have said that someone was trying to be......raaaccccisst. Too funny. I cannot believe that she wrote that without trying to write it that way...if you know what I mean.

Georgfelis said...

Seems to be a typo in this story. According to the esteemed R.S. McCain (The Other McCain), there are 5 as in Raaaaacist. I mean if people are going to fling the false charge about, they might as well spell it right.

Roger M. said...

Man oh man oh man. I think this deserves a double face palm..... yo.

Grizzly Mama said...

That's a shame. Does she understand how she's presenting herself to the world?

Rondell said...

Hey y'all, your #1 topic of discussion here. What's all the fuss? Why y'all hatin on me and my presidential supports? We need to embrace the post-racial society that we have entered in this year of 2010. Mmph.

Grizzly Mama said...

You sound stupid, Rondell.

Donald - she's over my blog shitting things up. Tupelo, MS? Doesn't look like that from SiteMeter.